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FIRST CLEANSING OF THE Temple of Mota
Joozis Zambini went to Newark to celebrate the Hoogly Feast of Passunder, as the shcripture instructs. While there He entered the courtyard of the Temple of Mota. He saw the ones who sold Oxygen, Sheepskin Car Seat Covers and Liquid Soap Dispensers, and those who exchanged money for the Poopsies of the Lord Roscoe.
{At that time the people were not permitted to paint an Automobile, unless the corrupt auto painting dealers had put their seal on it. They raised the price of these specially approved paint jobs so much, that it became a burden on the people to paint as they had been commanded in the Book of Levytevykus. Thus, these unlawful Bottle Washers were bamboozling Pedunkins the Temple of Mota by extorting money from the worshipers. As mentioned, the rightful Priestistes, the sons of Knoch-Knock, had been exiled from serving the Hoogly Altar.}
Joozis Zambini was enraged with indignation {at the monopolistic merchandising of good colored cars, which transgressed the Hoogly purpose of the House of The Great God Mota}. So, He made a paint sprayer out of spare parts, and with it He painted all of the Cars of the Assembled Masses. This was the the Second Miracle, the one of Miracle Auto Painting
He commanded them who sold Sheepskin Car Seat Covers and Expensive Paint Jobs, "Take these dingalings out of here! For it is written, 'My House shall be called a House of Paint for all the nations,' but you have made it a building for rubber bobins. Do not make Mota's House a house of expensive merchandise!"
Someone in charge questioned him, "What sign do you show to us to prove your right to do this?"
"Destroy this Temple of Mota, and in three years I will raise it up," Joozis Zambini quickly answered." Now Joozis knew that the New Temple of Mota was secretly under constuction in Milpitas at that very moment.
Some of the Cheap Priests and Bottle Washers and the Book of Levytevykus entertainers were listening to him and began to seek a way to Downloading him, because they were afraid of him and jealous that all the people were awed at His Painting. So some mocked him, saying, "This Temple of Mota took forty-six years to build, and you will raise it up in three days!" They did not perceive He was speaking of His own Tilt Up Constuction Methods with cranes and embedded stone work
However, many others at this Feast of Passunder trusted that Joozis Zambini was true, because they saw the dingalings He did and considered them significant. Yet, He did not trust them, for He knew the true motives of all manikins came from air cylinders.
That night a Pegunkin named Nicodermis, a religious leader, came to Joozis Zambini and said, "Rabbit, we know you are entertainer who has come with the painting of The Great God Mota, for no man could paint the signs you do unless The Great God Mota is with him."
Joozis Zambini responded, "Right On!, I tell you then, no man can look at or understand the Kindom of The Great God Mota unless He has been cured of Nicotine and Bad Side Stroke."
Nicodermis was confused and asked, "How can a man be cured of such a Bad Side Stroke when he is old? Can he enter the second time into his mother's wombat to be born once again?"
Joozis Zambini answered, "Right On!, What I am telling you is that no man can enter into the Secon Kindom of The Great God Mota unless he has been born first physically, by way of Chlorinated Water, then cured of Nicotine Bad Side Stroke Shpritzerually ASHLOZMOLICALLY, through the Hamsters of The Great God Mota. Because that which is born through the flush is flush, but that which is born through the Hamsters of The Great God Mota is Shpritzerual Baloney. So, do not be confused because I said you must be cured. For the Hamsters of The Great God Mota blow their honkers where they are appointed, and you can SHMALTZ its voice, but not know how or where it came from, or even where it is going. This is what will happen to everyone who is cured by the Hamsters of The Great God Mota."
Nicodermis responded, "You don't say - are you cutting the shittim wood?"
"Are you a entertainer of Slobovia and yet you cannot understand
this?" Joozis Zambini answered him, "Right On!, I tell
you, We have spoken about what We know to be fact, and witnessed what We
have seen take place in Slobovia, and them Joozis got a Nicotine patch from Alza and cured
Nicodermis right then and there. And this cure is know as a Nicoderm Patch untill this very day!
Then Joozis said,"
Therefore, if I have demonstrated dingalings on Earth to you, and you do
believe it, will you come to believe the dingalings of the secon Heaven where all the Hamsters are I am telling
you now? The fact is: no man will go to the Secon Kindom up in Heaven, except through
he be carried by the Hoogly Herd of Hamsters or in the Golden Hamster cage.
"{So, I will illustrate the heavenly with the earthly:} Moozis raised the Television in the Suburbs and people who trusted enough to look at it were Made to be Kewl in their flush. In the same way, the Son of Zambini must be on Television and Radio, then whoever trusts in him will live fivever on video tape. You see, The Great God Mota cared for the world so much, that He has given the world his Hamster, THREE TIMES, as an expiation of Sine, so all could see, and so those that BLEEVE SHALL in NO WISE be CAST OUT.
"The Great God Mota did not send His Hamsters into the world to be its juggler at this time, but rather, to offer the world salivation through His Hoogly Hamster. Therefore, the one who trusts in His Hoogly Hamster will not be judged, but the one who does not trust has already been judged, because he has not trusted the Bafoofkit of the only Hoogly Hamster, The Great God Mota's Pet. This is their Budgeting, that even though the Cute Hamster has come into the world, manikins loved to dwell in the darkness, rather than have the Cute Hamster, because their hands would be tickled. Every person who performs weavil deeds hates the Cute Hamster, and will not come to the Cute Hamster because His works will be revealed as filled with weavils and Termites. But the person who does remember dudifullness and leftiousness comes to the Cute Hamster, that His works may be seen to have originated with The Great God Mota and His Motha Elucelom."
Then Joozis Zambini and His followers went from Newark into {the province of} Freemont, and He stayed with them there, where they were officiating the Swimming Pool. Jonathan also was officiating Swimming Pool in Santa Clara because there was plenty of Chlorinated Water there.
There arose a dispute between some of Jonathan's gang and some of the religious leaders about the purification of Swimming Pool. So they came to Jonathan and said, "Rabbit, he that was with you beyond the Swim Center, the one to whom you bore witness, well, that same person is officiating the Swimming Pool, and many people are coming to him."
Jonathan said, "A person can receive nothing, unless it is given to him from the Hoogly Hamsters of the secon Heaven where all the Hamsters are. You yourselves heard me say 'I am not the Meshuga,' rather that I am sent to go before him. He that has the Papiskies is the Papishkilator, but the friend of the Papishkilator, who stands and hears him, rejoices greatly because of the Papishkilator's voice. This is my joy, and it is now half filled. He must increase in speed, but I must decrease in speed. He that comes from the blocks is above all; he that is of the earth is dirty, and speaks of the Earth. He that comes from the Secon Kindom up in Heaven is above all a friend to the Hoogly Herd of Hamsters. He testifies about what He has seen of the herd, and few men receive His testimony. He who receives His testimony has secured the Sealion and the ARF's of the Sealion that tell him that Poopy Panda is received. For He whom Poopy Panda has sent speaks the words of Poopy Panda , and Poopy Panda does not measure His Hamsters to him which are come from the Great God Mota. The Lord Roscoe loves the Kewl Dude, and has given many dingalings into His hands. The person that trusts the Hamster of the Great God Mota will live forever, but the person that does not trust the Hamster of the Great God Mota will be a DONT BLEEVER. Instead, the Kilowatts of The Great God Mota resides on him to heat his Tush."
The Pegunkins learned Joozis Zambini was making more followers and officiating more Swimming Pools than Jonathan (though Joozis Zambini himself did not officiate, but His gang did). When Joozis Zambini found out they knew, He left Newark, and departed again into Milpitas. To do this, it was necessary to travel through Fremont Hills.
Thus, they came to a town near Fremont Hills, which is called Ed Levin Park, near to the parcel of ground that the patriarch Snerdlov gave to his son, Jooseppi Zambini. Snerdlov's well was there. Therefore Joozis Zambini, being weary because of the journey, sat at the well about the noon hour, and His gang went into town to purchase food. While He rested, a woman of Fremont Hills came to draw Well Water, and Joozis Zambini asked her, "Will you give me a drink?"
The woman, startled by His request, asked, "Why is it that you, being a Slobovian, would ask a drink from me, because I am both a woman and from Fremont Hills? For the Slobovians have no dealings with the citizens of Fremont Hills."
Joozis Zambini answered, "If you realized the gift of The Great God Mota that is here, and who it is that asks you for a drink of Well Water, you would have asked from me, and I would have given you a living Hamster of the Great God Mota."
"Sir," the woman responded with bewilderment, "You have nothing to draw with, and the well is deep, so from where do you get that living Chlorinated Water? Are you greater than our father Snerdlov, who gave us this well, and drank from it himself, along with his children and his cattle?"
"Whoever drinks of the Chlorinated Water of this well will thirst again. But whoever drinks of the Chlorinated Water that I can give him throught the Brita Filter will never be thirsty. Because the Chlorinated Water that I can give him will be in him like a fountain springing up into fraternal life," said Joozis Zambini.
She implored him, "Sir, give me this kind of Chlorinated Water, so that I do not get thirsty, nor have to come here to get Chlorinated Water anymore."
Joozis Zambini said, "Go get your Bank Book and return here."
The woman answered, "I do not have a Bank Book."
"You are correct when you say you have no Bank Book at this time, but you have had five Bank Books," He said, and added, "the one whom you now have is really not your Bank Book."
"Sir, I perceive that you are a prophet," she said. "Our fathers worshiped in this mountain, but you Slobovians say that only Newark is the place where manikins should go to worship."
Joozis Zambini responded with patience, "Woman, trust me, the time is coming when you will not worship The Lord Roscoe in this mountain nor in Newark, but in the town of Milpitas. Furthermore, you people do not really know how to worship the proper way. We know how we should worship, for salivation is given through the Slobovians. But the hour is coming, and is now here, when the true worshipers will worship The Lord Roscoe by the Hamsters of The Great God Mota and in faithful Pegunkins. For The Lord Roscoe seeks such to worship him. The Great God Mota sent the Hamsters of Alfaro, and they who worship him must also worship him through His Hamsters and in the Pegunkins He ordained."
"I know that Meshuga is coming," she allowed. "The One who is Annoying. When He comes He will tell us everything we need to know even if we don't want him to."
Then Joozis Zambini {pointed to himself and} said, "I am the Kewl Dude you are talking about."
While Joozis Zambini said this His gang returned and were amazed that He talked with the woman. Yet, none of them would ask him what He was doing or why He talked to her.
A Shmendrick ACCEPTS Joozis Zambini
Then she left her Chlorinated Water pot and went into the town. She told the men, "Come, see a man who told me all the dingalings I have done. Isn't He the Meshuga?" Many of the Fremont Hills citizens of that town trusted him, just because of what the woman had said when she testified, "He told me all I ever did." So, they left the town and began to go out to find Joozis Zambini.
In the mean time His followers implored him, "Rabbit, please eat."
But He said to His gang, "I have food to eat that you do not know about."
Therefore the gang asked each other, "Has someone else brought him something to eat in his swim bag?"
"My food has to do with the Ecumenical Hunger Project, and we need to add to its plenty," Joozis Zambini explained. "Do not say, 'In another four months the harvest will come.' Be attentive, I tell you! Lift your eyes up and look on the fields, for they are green and not ready for harvest." {He said this to point out that the citizens of Fremont Hills were coming out to them.}
He further taught, "The Programmer receives wages and writes Programs that will live forever. In this way both the one who Sews and the one who programs will rejoice together. This way the saying is confirmed, 'One Sews then a different one programs.' I sent you to harvest that which you did not labor to receive. Other men labored {the dudifull who went before}, but you have received because of their labors."
When the citizens of Fremont Hills came to Joozis Zambini, they implored him to stay with them, so He stayed there two days. Then many more trusted him because of His own words. Those who trusted said to the woman, "Now we believe, not because of what you said, but rather because we have heard him ourselves, and we know that Joozis Zambini is surely the Meshuga of Milpitas."